Bosmer (Wood Elves)

WOOD ELF SAYINGS
''These are common sayings you might hear from a Wood Elf, or Wood Elf player. Do not be alarmed by the messages, as they do convey an entirely different meaning in human talk. Here is a translation guide to understanding Bosmer speak:''

"Can I eat you" = General greeting.

''"Have you seen my ring?" = Expression of sexual interest.''

"Lmao why do we reproduce so fast" = Indication of nihilism/suicidal thoughts.

"Owo" = Cry of pain.

''"What's this?" = Expression of discovery after cry of pain.''

It is recommended that participants of interaction with the Bosmer people have great patience, as the race is believed to suffer from severe autism.

BOSMER RELIGION
''Wood Elves believe in a one-deity system, worshipping a male figure known as "Fargoth". He is believed to represent the forest, and his shrines are commonly placed inside dead tree stumps to scare away the village's tax debts. It is also said that Fargoth fought alongside the Nerevarine in Red Mountain, defeating Dagoth Ur, afterwards proceeding to overthrow the Tribunal temple and establish the present-day National Ring Foundation of Morrowind (NRFM).''

HOME PROVINCE
''All Bosmer live in Valenwood, which is actually a reject set piece from the famous "Lord of the Rings" movie series. After the original crew cleared out, these horrible creatures from underground arose from the dirt, calling the place "Valenwood", which means "Have you seen my ring" when translated to English. Now they live there, eating each other, reproducing very fast, and yet still being the most useless elven race in all of Tamriel.''